I had been expecting MS to show itself. I was hoping to get lucky, and just experience more numbness that would eventually go away.
But, if I had paid attention to all the little things my body was whispering to me, I would have realized just how serious this can be. I wasn’t careful. I got sloppy, lazy. My body warned me and I didn’t listen. Now I am struggling to make it up the 13 stairs I used to run up and down. It was the heat of the hot tub that put the final nail in the, dare I say, coffin.
MS is not the death sentence it used to be. It’s more a matter of inconvenience for those who begin to care for the dis-ease at the onset/diagnosis. It’s the type of dis-ease that affects everyone differently, yet many experience the same symptoms. Drop-foot, which I just discovered I have, is quite common with MS sufferers. For some it hits hard, and it hits fast. For those people an extended stay in the hospital being plugged full of steroids is not uncommon. Steroids, in conjunction with other medications, are used to calm the dis-ease activity and speed recovery and remission. However, sometimes remission never comes.
MS is well researched, and advances are being made, in many different parts of the world. How and why people are affected is not fully understood – yet. For most it’s well-managed through drug protocols that are designed to lessen the intensity and severity of relapses.
I make it up the stairs, and am determined that I will bring back my good habits. I get a full night’s sleep even though I’m worried about what’s to come. Prior to falling asleep I had devised a plan of action. First, get my diet back on track. Second, an appointment with the piece-of-paper-writing neurologist where I will obtain a recommendation to go to the MS Clinic at UBC Hospital. Third, obtain a drug that helps reduce the number of relapses. Fourth, live a good life – love and care for myself, and my family. Hoping I haven’t missed anything, I fall asleep.
It’s only a week away from the 2011 Remembrance Day Ceremonies. I know I won’t be making it for the march to the cenotaph. I’ve made it every year as I believe it’s an important part of my service to honour those who sacrificed to make Canada a great country. I informed my employer of my new challenge, but agreed I am still able to function out of uniform.
A week later I’m in the office of my local neurologist. He watches me walk in and has a few questions for me about my new gait. We talk for a while and I ask for a recommendation to the MS Clinic at UBC. He agrees. He then asks me if I think I should be driving. Now I think I have had enough of this doctor. I’ve seen him three times in seven years, and each time he has had the bedside manner of a bed bug. I walked in to his office with a slight hitch in my step looking for a bit of help. I function as good as anybody (except the walk), and he’s questioning my ability to drive. I told him that my issue is with the left side of my body. I control the gas and the brake with the right without any effort. I have no critical thinking issues, and no problem with the upper part of my body. He then agreed that my ability to drive is not affected.
Slightly annoyed, I left. I got into my truck and as I drove away I wondered if the doctor has had negative interactions with the police in his past. I vow to never purposefully see him again.
Within a couple of months, I had another MRI then paid my first visit to the MS Clinic at UBC hospital. The clinic was in a dark and slightly depressing wing on the third floor of the old hospital. I attended the desk to speak with a young woman, who had just returned from lunch, and was informed that I would be seeing Dr. Kastrukoff shortly. I sat and waited in a half full waiting room. While waiting I observed other waiters in various stages of the dis-ease. Some were accompanied by friends or loved ones.
Having MS is incredibly difficult to understand for those who suffer and those who don’t, but are there to provide comfort and support.
While I sat and people watched an elderly gentleman, who dressed like an old professor of mine, walked out and called my name. I observed that he was wearing corduroy pants with a corduroy suit jacket. He walked and talked slowly, calmly, as we made our way to an examination room.
I sat on a chair, and we spoke about my history and my latest symptoms. He listened intently without interruption. He then examined me carefully and methodically. He was very thorough. He then spoke in a very soft voice. He has observed my latest MRI scans, and upon examination, agrees that I have MS. I completely trust and respect this man.
Now I need to pick the drug that will hopefully reduce the number and intensity of relapse. My appointment will be set and I will be contacted for the chance to meet with the nurse.
I’ve come to a fork in the road. I don’t want to take any drugs. If I don’t this could get worse – fast. Dr. Kastrukoff, the calm and trusted doctor, said it would be in my best interest to start right away.
I would really like a cup of coffee now.
On The Road With MS 